Aspen's Journal

9:35pm: :)
I really wish I could write in this honestly and get feedback without anyone getting upset or feeling akward... in a few days I will be able to do that... can hardly wait. Ive actually been watching my email.. which was killed a while back o_O,,, people don't really email me anymore. Anyhow... Nicci has yet another pair of pants that have distracted me... not green really.. I mean they have a green tint to em but orange is the color that sticks out on them O_o I like them cause they make her look cuddly o_o (is that normal?) Yeah ok I know I'm strange.... shh... anyhow we kinda just hung out today... Got a little rowdy after a while... ended up with Nicci, Richard, Celina and I wrestling on the couch. I ended up on the floor (thanks Nicci and Celina x.x) Overall it was fun :P This entry seems so empty... probably cause I'm only saying a quarter of what I'm thinking x_X sorry people but the good stuff is meant to remain hidden.

1:33am: *spazzmatic 500*
Well..... for the record... my last entry (for those of you who are able to read it) was a little unlike me... unlike who I want to be and wasn't directed towards anyone that you guys know. The person probably didn't deserve the majority of what I said about em... but spazzing in my lj about them kinda calmed me down... made the whole ordeal a little easier to get past. It's over now... and as usual I am confident in my ability to work things out with that person.

I was feeling really down after that... Kish signed on and cheered me up and calmed me down enough to get a few hours of sleep >@22\ ty Mizz... woke up blue still... I thought it was going to be one of those days that I lock myself in my room and bundle under a blanket for hours... would have been except Celina dragged me out cause her glasses broke. This led to me getting online... Nicci was on and I asked her to take me to the glasses place... which she did and we proceeded to her place. This is where I curled up in a ball on her couch... That's like my safe place now. Wanted to just lay there and fade away. As I was laying there thinking... Nicci and Richard sat on the couch and started playing with these cars... She thought I was asleep. As they played I kind of spaced out again and started thinking... then felt this smooth metal sweep across my arm...my first reaction was "O_o what the hell?" deciding to ignore this odd feeling... I went back into thought... and felt it again.. this time recognizing it as a car... figured Richard was driving it on my arm. After a few seconds I realized that the car had been very smooth... and imagined that if Richard was the one driving it that it would probably not have felt so gentle. After the third drive by I looked up at Nicci... kind of puzzled... and she kind of laughed. :P Her playful antics pulled me out of the little ball and back into focus again. lol... though it has had me wondering what else she does when I really am asleep o_o;; haha... ok I've been up too long.

12:17pm: yeah...

Green hair. You're an individual, and like to make
a statement, but you don't want to push your
opinions onto anybody. You are never afraid to
try new things.


What is your true hair color?
brought to you by Quizilla

1:16am: Special-ed Pixies! O_o
Derision Twist: Ooo I was trying to make an icon for Nicci... messed up the picture I was using lol....
Derision Twist: was a total accident...

*shows pics*

Brit Chik Kez: HAHAHAHA
Brit Chik Kez: I mean.... oh
Derision Twist: LOL
Derision Twist: she (Nicci) was like... what the hell?
Brit Chik Kez: that's SO funny
Brit Chik Kez: lol
Brit Chik Kez: looks kind of demented- the "special ed pixie"
Derision Twist: hahahah

12:44am: Things that make you go Hmmm....

Narcissists... To the outside world it appears that these people "love" themselves. Yet, at their core they don't love themselves--in fact their self barely exists, and what part does exist is deemed worthless. All energy is devoted to inflating the self, like a persistent child trying to blow up a balloon with a hole.

2:21pm: I've been kind of psyched today. I have a new online home... feeling very comfortable with these people. Not that Im no longer comfortable with everyone I've been spending the past year and a half with... just that I have found a new online purpose. A new way to help... and people who want to help me too. Again Im not saying that people here dont want to help... just that the interaction I have with these other people is helping a lot. It also helps to have social interaction with people outside of the computer. Karri signed on today... I really hope she is doing ok... has to have surgery. x_x fun... Hmm and Ps asked me something yesterday that kinda stuck in my head. No details here cause its not right to bring up... But it was a very thought provoking question. I'm all green happy today ^_^ really should clean house.... yeah.... after I shower or something though.

1:36pm: lol oops... I forgot to log out of LJ at Nicci's house... she accidentally posted in mine x_x *deleted*

6:30pm: Name: Aspen
Birthday: July 16
Birthplace: Denver Colorado
Current Location: Nicci's house
Current School: no comment
Current Job: no comment
Nicknames: lkjlkjlkjlk
Eye Color: brown
Hair Color: brown
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac Sign: Cancer
Innie or Outie: Innie
Religion: no comment
Font: Comic Sans, Andy, PAPYRUS!!! oo yeah papyrus.

--[ SERIES 2 - YOUR FAVOURITE ]--

Music: Punk/Ska
Cartoon/Anime: powerpuff girls
Color: Green
Movie: disturbing behavior
Slushy Flavor: uh... o.O Green
Book: Hp series
Magazine: blah
TV Show: Malcolm in the middle
Song: currently: n/a
Language: Swedish :P
Spice Girl: lol Paprika?
Food & Beverage: unsure
Subject in School: Criminal justice
Weekend Activity: Hanging out with Nicci
Holiday: St Patricks day
Ice Cream Flavor: chocolate chip cookie dough
Perfume/Cologne: Tresor by Lancome
Roller Coaster: I liked the wildcat (Elitch Gardens-Denver Colorado) it was torn down
Cereal: lucky charms

--[ SERIES 3 - WHO IS ]--

the prettiest person you know: pretty is such a feminine/girly word... I would describe Kish as beautiful though
the weirdest person you know: My Mum... o_O lets all listen to our insides go squish... chew your food and hear the chomp!
the funniest person you know: I think I laugh the hardest around Karri... but then I crack up on the inside when around Nicci.
the loudest person you Know: Kristine
the Quietest Person you Know: N
the Sweetest Person you Know: Erika
the Sorriest Person you Know: no comment
the Scariest Person you Know: scary people end up stalking me and/or have really strange habits.... >.>
the Sexiest Person you Know: no comment
the sneakiest person you know: Kish
Your best friend: Kish
the Person you Hate the Most: myself
the person you love the most in the whole entire world right now: no comment
your Crush?: crush's are for monkeys
Most Boring Teacher: no comment

--[ SERIES 4 - WHAT IS ]--

your most overused phrase on aol: lol
the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning: Damn, what time is it and why was I dreaming that?
the last image/thought you go to sleep with: "How can she be so harsh?"
the first feature you notice in the opposite sex: opposite- hair.... same- tummy
the Best Name for a Butler: Dobson
the wussiest sport: golf... unless you make it really fun by changing all the rules and making it a contact sport...
the song that best descibes you: Pain-Midgets with guns
your best feature: unsure
your bedtime: I sleep when I have time... kind of revolve my schedule around others
your greatest fear: >.>
your greatest accomplishment: unsure... not good to give yourself too much credit
your most missed memory: this time last year...
Inside jokes: >@22\jajajajajajajajajajaja

SERIES 5 - YOU PREFER? ]--

pepsi or coke: Pepsi
McDonald's or Burger King: McDonalds for lunch... BK for breakfast
single or group dates: single
adidas or nike: for firewood? Nike burns longer but adidas smells better ;)
chicken nuggets or chicken fingers: Nuggets
dogs or cats: Cats
rugrats or doug: Rugrats
single or taken: single
Monica or Brandy: o_O?
Tupac or Jay-Z: Jay-Z
Shania Twain or LeAnn Rhymes: uh o.O Shania?
AeroSmith or Red Hot Chilli Peppers: both
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: unsure
one pillow or two: 2
chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
hot chocolate or hot cocoa: chocolate
cappucino or coffee: neither
drinks with or without ice cubes: without
boxers or briefs: boxers
give or receive: give.

--[ SERIES 6 - DO YOU ]--

take a shower everyday: almost
have a(any) crush(es): blah
think you've been in love: Yes
want to go to college: yes
like high school: liked it
want to get married: no >_>
type with your fingers on the right keys: yeah lol
Believe in yourself: sometimes...
have any tattoos/where? no
have any piercings/where? ears... every survey asks this...
get motion sickness: no
think you're a health freak: no
get along with your parents: sure
like thunderstorms: not in Georgia... the water just sits around x_x

--[ SERIES 7 - THE FUTURE ]--

Age you hope to be married? youre evil
Number and Names of Children: 1-Celina (looks like Im on track eh?)
Where do you see yourself at age 20? >_>
Descibe your Dream Wedding: O_o blah
When/How do you want to die: I want to die young... and in a creative fashion... guess if I have to go it might as well be memorable
What do you want to be when you grow up? grow up? dont you get it? x.x I'm as grown as I'll ever be
What country would you most like to visit? Sweden

--[ SERIES 8 - OPPOSITE SEX]--

best eye color?
best hair color?
short or long hair?
best height?
best weight?
best articles of clothing?
best first date location?
best first kiss location?
descibe your dream mate:

--[ SERIES 9 - OTHER ]--

What do you Wear to bed? depends on my mood
When's the last time you slept with a stuffed animal: few nights ago... though its certainly no salty
Have you ever played the ouija board: yeah
How many rings until you answer the phone: 2-3
What's on your mouse pad: I have... three... ones a dell mousepad... then I have a WDK mousepad... then a pooh bear pad. x.x
How many houses have you lived in? unsure
How many schools have you gone to?: 8
What color is your bedroom carpet? blue
Would you shave your head for $5000 dollars: would do it for 1000 =x any offers?
If you were stranded on a desert island and you could only take three things with you what would you take: a sturdy home, a large box of seeds to plant, and a friend.... any offers?
What was the best time of your life so far: This time last year was great...

9:31am: I found out the other day that Steph had a baby. I'ts a boy. Anthony Aaron. Had him last Monday. That's really the only thing I have to write about right now... honestly cant express my true thoughts or feelings in this thing sometimes cause of the people who read it. I keep a second journal for that =x I mean my thoughts go into this... but when it comes to writing feelings (good/bad) about friends I am more honest knowing that they wont be reading it.

12:59pm: [ x ] Spell your first name backwards ? nepsA
[ x ] The story behind your user name ? I was nicknamed Aspen at an Outward Bound course in the Rocky Mountains. Kept the name.
[ x ] Where do you live ? Right next to this really big swamp...
[ x ] 4 words that sum you up ? quiet, stubborn, caring, amused
DESCRIBE YOUR
[ x ] Wallet ? old... torn up. Used to be blue but lost its color... gray now with Mickey Mouse on it... it has phone numbers of my closest buddies on it.
[ x ] Hairbrush ? neon green and white... uh... bristly :P
[ x ] Toothbrush ? I have a few... theyre all green ^_^
[ x ] Pillow cover ? I have a pillow cover for my body sized pillow... its hunter green ^_^
[ x ] Blanket ? I have 5 blankets... my favorite one is blue and hunter green. I also have a harry potter blanket... then black and gray... purple and gray... and light orange O_o
[ x ] Coffee cup ? x_x I have a hunter green coffee cup. I dont drink coffee tho
[ x ] Sunglasses ? lmao... theyre green ^_^
[ x ] Underwear ? *cough* o.O surprise... theyre black mostly.
[ x ] Shoes ? all black... DC's theyre my skater punk shoes :P
[ x ] Favorite top ? hmm... any of my Mxpx shirts... I prefer the tighter fitting ones.
[ x ] Cologne/Perfume ? Tresor by lancome
[ x ] CD in stereo right now ? I'm at Nicci's o_O we have bass 305 in the car tho
[ x ] Tattoos ? n/a
[ x ] Piercings ? earlobes and cartilage (right ear)
[ x ] What you are wearing now ? black mxpx longsleeve shirt, jeans
[ x ] Hair ? long.. brown... yeah
[ x ] Makeup ? not wearing any
[ x ] In my mouth ? nothing at the moment
[ x ] In my head ? thinking... about C o.o
[ x ] Wishing ? no comment
[ x ] After this ? pizza
[ x ] Talking to ? Nicci
[ x ] Eating ? will eat when done... Pizza!!!
[ x ] Fetishes ? GREEN, tummies, water
[ x ] If you could get away with it and murder anyone, who and for what reason ? no comment =x just in case I ever get the chance... no one would suspect Aspen o_O
[ x ] Person you wish you could see right now ? Kish
[ x ] Is next to you ? Nicci and the little ones are on the couch behind me..
[ x ] Something you're looking forward to in the upcoming month ? I want to go to that rave x.x
[ x ] The last thing you ate ? minty skittles
[ x ] Something that you are deathly afraid of? falling
[ x ] Do you like candles ? fire.... ;)
[ x ] Do you like hot wax ? yes :)
[ x ] Do you like incense ? not specifically
[ x ] Do you like the taste of blood ? sometimes
[ x ] Do you believe in love ? yes
[ x ] Do you believe in soul mates ? no
[ x ] Do you believe in love at first sight ? no
[ x ] Do you believe in saying 'I love you' ? Yeah
[ x ] Do you believe in Heaven ? yes
[ x ] Do you believe in forgiveness ? yeah.
[ x ] Do you believe in God ? :) yes
[ x ] What do you want done with your body when you die ? unsure. just dont uh.... eww nvm
[ x ] Who is your worst enemy ? myself
[ x ] If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be ? something small... maybe a rock :P
[ x ] What is the latest you've ever stayed up ? I dont have a clue... been up for days at a time
[ x ] Ever been to Belgium ? o_O no
[ x ] Can you eat with chopsticks ? yes ^_^
[ x ] What's your favorite coin ? fond of yen
[ x ] What are 5 cities you wouldn't mind relocating to ? Denver Co=x, Boston Ma, Richmond Va, Waco Tx, Greeley Co
[ x ] What are some of your favorite pig out foods ? cheesecake bars =x
[ x ] What's something that you wish people would understand ? eachother x_x'''
[ x ] What's something you wish you could understand better ? more like someone. "C"
[ x ] Anyone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time ? yes.. sorta. when I think about it I guess I'd rather not see them again though.
[ x ] What's one thing you want to make happen for tomorrow ? anything out of the norm =x

12:16am: Nothing like a good scary movie to get everyone huddled in the living room together for the night lol. We watched the ring. ^_^ fun.

1:58am: I ended up speaking to Karri on the phone for over three hours... x.x oops? needless to say it was a good convo... I haven't laughed this hard in quite a while. We joked about a lot of things... laughed about stupid things we did... and about how mean I was to my brother x_x;; Poor guy. I told her about running Lenita over with the bicycle... then getting beat senseless while laughing through it. We spoke about Outward Bound... She's the only person I know who can understand where I'm coming from when I speak about Outward Bound cause she was there... We weren't in the same group or anything but she was in the mountains going through similar experiences... and I found out that while I was trudging around wiping my ass with pine cones she had BABY WIPES! Rawr! lol... she was lucky in that aspect. I confessed to several bad things I did there... lol... For our solo we were all given 20 raisins, 20 peanuts, 9 crackers and 3 powder drinks to mix with water.... for 2-3 days.... that's it. I uh... stole extra food =x Krista and I snuck over the ONE time we were allowed to bathe in the very very very cold river... and checked out all the naked guys. Lisa was too busy dancing around naked in the river to come with.... that is one slightly OFF girl. ;) lol that's all I confessed to... probably all worth mentioning here as far as OB goes. In my confessions... Karri pointed out something very vital to getting to know me... if my answer to a question is "I don't know" I probably mean... "you shouldn't know" trust us... its probably best if no one knows :P lol that and she has a picture of my feet... she's never seen my feet... only in that picture. I think the only people to see my feet in the past year are Nicci, Celina and Richard. o_o' maybe Mike... lol I should have gone to bed hours ago... was so tired... and planned on just chatting a little before dozing off... was doing fine till I had to look something up in my yearbook... before I knew it I was wide awake and cracking up with her.

9:22pm: Uncle Gene had me trying to eat pickled eggs... sour things. x.x Tear said brb over two hours ago x_X lol. she puts new meaning behind the concept. Aim has been quiet today... partially due to the fact Ive been taking time away and 80+people are blocked =x though I had been wondering why I havent seen certain people around.. never occured to me till now that they might be blocked... sure enough they were... cant complain anymore that theyre not on :P Kish has been gone... I miss her. =/ Spent half the day with Nicci... We had salads from Wendy's today.. actually pretty good o.o. I want more. hmmmmmm gonna go now.

12:31pm: THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:

1. falling
2. the thought of being alone for life
3. large open spaces

THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:

1. Tofu
2. N
3. Eye

THREE THINGS I LOVE:

1. friends
2. music
3. GREEN

THREE THINGS I HATE:

1. harsh people
2. when I cant get my socks to match up right
3. when people try to pawn their own insecurities off on me.

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:

1. French >.<
2. the economy
3. Why the ground in Georgia never soaks up the water...

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:

1. Gargoyle
2. a blue cup (almost famous cup o_o)
3. jar of honung puder

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:

1. this survey
2. wondering where Im going to get food.
3. wanting to sleep

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:

1. Meet Kish
2. start my community
3. Go to Sweden

THREE THINGS I CAN DO:

1. read
2. write
3. roll....O_o well I can

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:

1. quiet
2. intelligent
3. caring

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY LOOKS:

1. ask
2. someone
3. else

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:

1. naturally fly o_o
2. shoot lasers out my eyes
3. read minds (believe it x.x)

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:

1. perhaps
2. eh?
3. >@22\

THREE OF YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE FOODS:

1. Rice
2. salad
3. chicken

THREE THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO LEARN:

1. Swedish
2. advanced criminal justice
3. martial arts

THREE BEVERAGES YOU DRINK REGULARLY:

1. Dr Pepper
2. Red Fusion
3. Jack Daniels hard cola

THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID:

1. Teenage Mutant Ninja turtles
2. Home improvement
3. MTV music videos

12:55am: I just dug myself into a hole... I think Im going to spend the night in it so as to remember tomorrow just how I got here... then to dig myself back out while theres daylight to clear my path and brighten the situation.

2:53am: lol I'm still wired!!! I hope this lasts cause I have to be awake tomorrow... Well later today. Told Nicci that I'd go with her places... ^_^ Karri showed up for a little bit... gave me Lamports e-mail address... I followed my suspicion that he used the same name on his address as a screen name and sure enough he showed up a little while ago. For anyone who is reading this and has no idea who he is... he's my 8th grade math teacher. :) helped me out a lot... Karri too. So I chatted with him a little and danced with Eye to some really odd upbeat happy stuff O_o then e-mailed Lamport to fill him in on what I've been up to the past few years. lol... e-mailed him about thongs... XD. Yeah I know I'm not sane. :P Caught me at a hyper time! its like 2:40am and I'm still dancing and clapping like a maniac. OOooo and I went outside to try to fly... it was very foggy. there were no lights on out there so I came back in kind of quickly. doot doot boing boing! ;)

10:13pm: Pattern time...

mollysSX: u r strange tonight...what did you eat???
SoMeWeIrDo7654: your scaring me
Brit Chik Kez: Aspen- have you been taking those specail happy pills again...
Brit Chik Kez: becasue I'm starting to worry

The Seven Deadly Sins

ANGER
1. Who did you last get angry with? Myself
2. What is your weapon of choice? Knife
3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex? yes
4. How about of the same sex? not as likely as me hitting a guy
5. Who was the last person who got really angry at you? Kish
6. What is your pet peeve? unintelligence
7. Do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily? I let go easily

SLOTH
1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you haven't done in a long time? pray
2. What is the latest you've ever woken up? o_O I dont have any sort of sleeping pattern... uh... cant answer that
3. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't? Marilyn
4. What is the last lame excuse you made? made a few when I broke my loyalty with a friend recently
5. Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through (one of the long ones...)? lol... yeah... it was for this vaccuum... they were picking up nails and bolts...
6. When was the last time you got a good workout in? killer friday.... x_X was a while back but ugh that was painful
7. How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock today? a few... maybe 6 but it was between two naps

GLUTTONY
1. What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice? Jack daniels hard cola?
2. Meat eaters: white meat or dark meat? white
3. What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event? I dont know... kinda passed out.
4. Have you ever used a professional diet company? No
5. Do you have an issue with your weight? Not really
6. Do you prefer sweets, salty foods, or spicy foods? hmm salty
7. Have you ever looked at a small housepet or child and thought, "LUNCH!"? LOL yes.... here tweety... =x

LUST
1. How many people have you seen naked (not counting movies/family)? hmm quite a few
2. How many people have seen YOU naked (not counting physicians/family)? not so many... 4?
3. Have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of a member of your gender of choice during a normal conversation? I kept catching myself staring at Nicci's pants... theyre green.
4. Have you "done it"? yes...
5. What is your favorite body part on a person of your gender of choice? tummy...
6. Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute? yes o_O
7. Have you ever had to get tested for an STD or pregnancy? yes, both.

GREED
1. How many credit cards do you own? 0
2. What's your guilty pleasure store? N/A
3. If you had $1 million, what would you do with it? WDK would be a spoiled guild. o.O
4. Would you rather be rich, or famous? rich
5. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks? yes
6. Have you ever stolen anything? yep... did it a lot as a kid
7. How many MP3s are on your hard drive? 600ish

PRIDE
1. What one thing have you done that you're most proud of? I feel guilty mentioning it
2. What one thing have you done that your parents are most proud of?
3. What thing would you like to accomplish in your life? to live with my close friends.
4. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place? sometimes
5. Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors? not that I recall
6. Have you ever cheated on something to get a higher score? yes...
7. What did you do today that you're proud of? Eye and I conquered the evil yellow folders!

ENVY
1. What item (or person) of your friends would you most want to have for your own? >.<
2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with? eh?
3. If you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be? Myself.
4. Have you ever been cheated on? yes
5. Have you ever wished you had a physical feature different from your own? yeah...
6. What inborn trait do you see in others that you wish you had for yourself? o.O??? uh green eyes?
7. Do you wish you'd come up with this survey? Nope
8. Finally, what is your favorite deadly sin? why favor something considered deadly?

The Seven Heavenly Virtues

FAITH
1. What religion do you follow? Non denominational Christian
2. What religion were you raised as? n/a
3. Do you believe that forgiveness is a religious property, or a human property? Human
4. Do you believe in magic? Yes
5. What was the last promise you broke? I cant say =/
6. Have you ever said the words to a prayer and not meant it? yes.... on the same aspect I have said satanic ritual things and not meant them.
7. Do you believe that anyone could be perfect? I believe Jesus was without sin... could be considered perfect.

HOPE
1. Did you get everything you wanted over the last holiday season? one should never hope for things like that... but no... I didnt.
2. Regarding your future, what is the best thing you could hope for? I'm under the impression it will never happen
3. Do you let yourself get your hopes up for something even if you know that there is a large chance of failure? again... I really try not to though
5. Have you ever bought a lottery ticket? nope
6. Do you gamble? No
7. Have you ever had something called off on account of bad weather, but then gone ahead and done it anyway? No

CHARITY
1. What causes do you support? No comment
2. What causes have you given money or time to? no comment. prefer to remain anonymous
3. Have you ever worked in a soup kitchen or done another kind of outreach for the homeless? No
4. Would you ever consider joining the Peace Corps, Amnesty International, or another travel? yes
5. Do you give money to the homeless on the street? I have
6. Have you ever helped out a friend with basic needs, like rent or food? yep
7. What's the greatest extent you've gone to help a friend in need? no comment. <3 for them though.

FORTITUDE
1. What are you most afraid of? being alone
2. What did you do today that was really brave? nothing today
3. Who is your favorite superhero, and why? are the powerpuff girls considered superheroes? if so then buttercup... shes green. and theyre all sarcastic
4. Would you put your life in danger to rescue someone? Yes...
5. If you were to face the Wizard, would you want more courage, more brains, or more heart? heart
6. Have you ever gotten stage fright? If so, when? not really that bad... gotten anxious
7. Do you consider yourself to be a leader or a follower? kind of both.

JUSTICE
1. Have you ever been summoned for jury duty? Friendly reminder to all to not register to vote =x
2. If they reinstituted the draft (for both genders), would you go, or would find some way out of it? I wouldnt go.
3. Do you support capital punishment (the death penalty)? yes...
4. Which should be guaranteed legal? which... what?
5. Do you believe that Dubya is rightfully President of the USA? I think the country isnt willing to back him up lol so not really
6. What was your favorite media circus trial? None
7. Have you ever written a letter to a politician? No

TEMPERANCE
1. What do you have the hardest time moderating yourself on? I get these urges and have troubles controlling em. no details >.>
2. Do you collect anything? state keychains
3. Are you addicted to anything? green o.O
4. Have you ever put anything on layaway or used an installment plan? no
5. What's your preferred method of paying for things? Cash
6. Tell us one thing you wish you hadn't let yourself do? hurt my friend
7. Do you feel that you obsess over things? yes

PRUDENCE
1. Who is the wisest person you know? Nicci
2. Have you ever participated in a vigil? no
3. Do you take advice when it's given? always listen... not always follow
4. What area are you wisest in? things Ive experienced
5. Do you drive defensively? yes... except for when I went to Canada... o_O crazy people there.
6. Have you ever had unprotected sex outside of marriage? yes
7. What did you learn today? learned how to change those evil ugly folders >: )
8. And of course, what is your favorite heavenly virtue? would fall under the category of compassion. Though without hope... you die.

8:02pm: I spent half the day fiddling with the computer cause I somehow got it in my head that those ugly yellow folders had to go... theyre very swirly and green now. ^_^ I'm getting kicks off of looking at my desktop O_o;; anyhow... Ive been putting off a small project all day, really should do that. blah its so boring though... final outcome MIGHT be nice, thats why Ive put it off so long... cant get into projects with the assumption that I might be disappointed and have wasted my time. Celina just brought me nail polish... reminds me that Kish and I were talking about painting our toenails together o_o That would be a first. I dont know if she was joking or not but I was amused at the idea. Been listening to bouncy music all day.... Oh... also got a call from the same area code as Kish today... >.> picked it up in case it was her and got some bill collector. We are over 6000.00 in debt. It's ok... I have some time to fix that. OOOOOOOooooooo I'm getting hyper. O_o Gonna go do stuff.

6:36am: I was feeling so down yesterday... Called Kish and as usual she picked me up... dusted me off and sent me on my way again. Unsure if she even knew I had been upset when I called. <3 for her. She was telling me about baby chicks and caring for them. :) >@22\

I met ludy yesterday... someone with experiences similar to mine... was really different to have someone to relate to like that. I was asked to come back too... Perhaps I've found a new online home? Perhaps just a new place to escape to...

6:29pm: guys are funny... I left them alone in a chat room for a few minutes... this has me wondering what goes through their minds...

EOTB2002: *keeps hitting you in the head with his fist till ya fall down* o_o MY SPOT!
Chibi Muro: um.... what r u tryin to do
EOTB2002: get you down from my spot o_o
Chibi Muro: fine
Chibi Muro: *moves 5 feet from you*
EOTB2002: o_o
EOTB2002: I have a fork and I know how to use it.
EOTB2002: *pulls out a spoon*
Chibi Muro: I have a voodoo doll
EOTB2002: Aspen probably gonna want this spoon later >.>; better make the most of my time with it
EOTB2002: o_o
Chibi Muro: *moves to you, takes it, than moves away*
EOTB2002: o_o lol aspen will want that spoon when she see it ya know
Chibi Muro: ill make sure she gets it




EOTB2002: wonder what aspen will think when she seeing me hanging upside down from the ceiling.. o-o;
Chibi Muro: *points* ha, monkey man

o.o I don't know what to make of it lol. :P

On a serious level... something symbolic happened this morning when I was cleaning. I don't wish to go into detail... but its sad. Kind of humbling. A reminder to all out there to respect and love your friends and loved ones cause before you know it they'll be gone.

4:21am: With all the sleep I got the last two days its no wonder I'm wired now. Only 11 people on my buddy list now and all of them are away. Which leads to some serious house cleaning. lol I would rather clean house than play games online or even write in this... Just wanted to write that I spoke to Konoko on a civil level. tried to get past the awkward feeling but it was enough to be able to speak for a bit without either of us insulting each other. I also got the urge tonight to follow some real life interests... was told I was self centered =x perhaps in some ways I might be... but I think they overlooked my intent behind telling them about my rl goals. Either way... these are just random thoughts. I spoke with Nicci about some things... and it's really interesting to have someone who sees both my online and offline ways. She's a very caring person. We might be going to a rave later this month. I think its this month...^_^ looking forward to that. It's been so long since I've done anything out of the regular boring people activities. I trust her enough to go with her too... I would usually do stuff like that alone...not raves... but concerts or other things like that cause I would trust strangers before I trusted my rl friends... sad eh? She saw my feet too... I was more amused by that than she was... came out of the bathroom after showering there and said "Look... I have feet!" then kinda wiggled my toes... she turns around and looks at me odd... asks "what?" and I started laughing and wandered off. OH!!! >.>....<.< I have pink on my socks =x!

3:25pm: I feel new
another 12 or so hours of sleep... I think all of that time without decent sleep caught up to me. Top that off with a really nice shower... not my shower at home that changes temperature constantly and the water smells like sulfer... but a nice hot shower where I felt clean afterwards... I feel new. :) Many of my online friends have shyed away... I think its due to the way I handled things when I found out about Konoko. I've noticed that the people who have been so quick to forgive them havent offered evidence of who they say they are. A lot of people seem afraid now to speak their mind around me as if I would judge them as well. The entire thing has had everyone on edge. x_X I guess this is one of those experiences that tests your friendship. Brings you closer to some people and distances you from others. Anyhow... time to go.

3:09pm: I was in a rush for my last entry.. had just woken up and was setting up lj for Nicci. We ended up having to hang out and wait anyhow so Im here again writing while I have a chance. I think that 1-64 has an automobile epidemic. It's a curse... or something. Unsure if its due to the fact we live in a swamp and our cars are crying mutiny... or if it has more to do with the fact we all parked our cars at Ami's house O_o Either way there's a bunch of us without cars right now.... I'm going to try to get mine taken care of asap... I know I keep saying that... lol but now that Nicci's car is shot too I want to try to help her out.

12:15pm: Well... I finally got some sleep. o_O lots of it actually. Wide awake now. ^_^

11:39pm: I was amused by this conversation....


mollySX: wow...looks like you made your point
Derision Twist: that's how I am online... not quite the same irl.. too shy irl to make any points clear
mollySX: I see
Derision Twist: you get to see my online and offline ways... do you think they're similar?
mollySX: ummm.no you r in complete control online you would make a good online dominatirix.....or how ever you spell it...
Derision Twist: do you see me as having a lack of control irl?
mollySX: in rl you seem almost innocent....with a hint of darkness..its almost like you hold yourself back with a lot of things...but its busting at the seams...
Derision Twist: lol :-)
Derision Twist: you're rather observant
mollySX: no not a lack of but being to nice is sometimes the worst weakness....
mollySX: yes I am

so there you have it... ^_^ I'm the innocent one... *whistles* lol and yes... I have those urges... and they're strong... but I haven't answered them... yet.

and I agree on the comment about being nice